This post was a long time coming and Monday’s read was a sign that it had to happen or so I like to believe.
The past few weeks or month(s), – with the weeks combined – have been nothing short of a whirlwind. It’s been work, nonstop except for that Friday night, but even so I wake up the next morning – a Saturday mind you – to an alarm I forget to turn off.
But work is good and for some of us as work becomes equivalent to sanity. We tend to take on more work than our little mind’s can handle because of the constant need to be occupied (and they say an idle mind’s a devil’s workshop). However, my body began sending me messages starting with stress-induced colossal hair loss to lower pressure readings and more recently and seriously, a relatively messed up wrist.
My laptop too, did this to me:
I’ve written about happiness quite a bit, or so my blog-post history tells me – and no, I never got around to completing that database, sigh. It seems as though I tend to reminisce a lot about what once was and am on a never ending quest in search for happiness.
But until now, I have never spoken of happiness as a stand alone subject.
It’s not as though I have found the key to happiness, I mean seriously, lol. But in this search for happiness, two things become important: what one defines as happiness (because it is a subjective topic) and what you would do to make happiness, a reality.
As for me, I’ve always been a fan of seeking content as opposed to happiness, solely because it’s monotonous and thus, less susceptible to variations.
I enjoy monotony for a few reasons: it’s consistent and uncomplicated (unlike the work I do 😉 ). I do not necessarily crave adventure and more often than not, I let myself be governed by the principle of live and let live. This does definitely limit quite a number of experiences, I wouldn’t disagree, but unless it’s something (or someone) I’m truly passionate about, I really wouldn’t go that extra mile.
The thing about consistency and monotony speak for itself. While there isn’t much effort involved, there is that initial trial, error and struggle to attain this level of “zen” or content. An element I apply for most things in my life and in retrospect, something that would have saved a lot of my badly-ended relationships, (minus the last of course) – I thought I wrote about it in my letter to him, but apparently not – had I gazed upon this when I was younger.
Hence, what’s throwing me off guard is perhaps the lack of consistency, in everything for that matter. But then again, it also narrows down to if it is consistency that I really seek (in these present circumstances) because this consistency would come with commitments I’m not willing to make.
But until saner sunnier times, here are my current life choices:
I hope all you babies are well and I’ll see you tomorrow. Yes, I’m writing tomorrow as well to both make up for my lack of posts (I love how I always overestimate the potential of my readership – lol) and also in the name of sanity.