Before I begin explaining the title, let me just say that after Day Ten slash tomorrow, I might go on a tiny break once more. I am tired. Mostly physically exhausted but the mental strain has become even more overwhelming. It’s funny how every time I think of how tired I am, I rethink to how things were when the year started and everything was sunny and it seemed like the best year of my life. Not that it wasn’t, it very much was. Perhaps one or two major life events that turned sour now seems to have shattered everything else that matters. It is temporary, if in case I sounded suicidal, lol, but at the moment I see nothing but grey clouds and dark skies.
Winter is coming.
I’ve been at a funeral since last evening, it was my step dad’s uncle who passed away. His children are not in the country, except for one seemingly not too useful son, but the others seemed no better either. One of the children who came on Skype had the audacity to say, “Hope the funeral goes well” or something to that extent. It’s such a shame to have seen this and at that moment I couldn’t help but think how disadvantageous it was to live away from your parents.
In other related funeral news, the last day has also shown me how little I knew about the formalities of a funeral on what needs to be done how and so on.
Also, as a “writer”, I was entrusted with the task of writing an article and having a look at the obituary notice and what not. As the grand uncle who died was “famous” in his own capacity an article was required. There was an only so much I could fluff and the newly widowed grand aunt.
Since last night I have made a mental note to remind myself to write all these and probably save it online before dying. I think nicely crafted words at my funeral will be very important to me.
It’s much later now and after speaking briefly to a friend I realised that I have lost track of days and forgotten which day it was, lost track of when I last slept and to top it all currently living on four salon-pas(s) and a few painkillers a day.
Tomorrow will be better.