But then what is reality, if not what we define ourselves? Reality and normalcy are the world as we know it. It is not within our control, which is why seek a world outside it.
So I was to write this over the weekend, but that never materialised. So what else is new?
Well a lot of things to start with but let’s not get in to that. I’m not too sure if it is nostalgia from four years past but somewhere this time, or a little before this time in 2010 when I left to India. I sought India as a place of solace, escape and moreover peace. Not that I was a “troubled” person. Well I was, yes, but no more than you are. Over the years I have grown to accept that we are all troubled in our own sense and if we think we are special coz we are not, then there is something absolutely wrong with you. I am no more troubled than you are and vice versa. So quit being a punk about it. Mind you, this is advise and reassurance I’m also giving myself.
I am not too sure where it all started but there were some boy issues then and there were certain spatial issues (you know my issue of “space” noh) I had a while to get used to and well, I needed a new start. I am thankful to my mother who was willing to see through my education and for my sister too for having paid for a fair share of expenses. Would I ever be able to pay them back? I am not too sure, but I do hope that my actions would be on the lines of something that would make them happy.
It’s perhaps that time of year again, perhaps driven by nostalgia and philosophical conversations that make me wonder if we all need to constantly run away from reality, and why.
It’s not as though I seek happiness that I already do not have, but then perhaps it is that constant message of underachievement, underperformance and a lot of other negative cues that make me feel this way. In times and circumstances such as these, it is only a sadass blog post that would help me get by.
I hope there are sunnier days ahead. The clouds are messing with the sun and making the rains comes down. I’m not too sure if that is a good thing.
I hope all you babies are having a good week.