To all those who need that extra drop of faith
I am unsure if I have written about this before (once again my need for a database of sorts or to update the one I started a few months ago) but I thought it was time, especially with the circles of doubt that is encircling me and mostly those around me, which seems to also impact me! Sighpie.
I’m not sure if I write this for reassurance, but I mostly write, (as most writers do, duh) from the experiences that surround me.
As an individual, I am not easily influenced by things or people, which is why I do not run behind sales, but in fact avoid them. Unless I am in Dubai and we are talking labels! 🙂 When it comes to opinion, I frankly believe that I give more than I would like to receive. Perhaps, people know that I anyway end up doing what I consider to be right and therefore refrain from giving me a genuine piece of their mind, but I do genuinely value feedback and opinion.
But this post for once, isn’t about me.
I should’ve retitled to ‘On Those Who Need to be Convinced’, but that sounded too un-Bacon-ee and too long a title.
The deal about conviction or belief is that it is very personal. If I take the example of religion, for me, I treat it as a personal relationship with God. My attire may suggest otherwise, but it is a belief system I have created for myself and above all, it is very personal.
I know this post isn’t meant to be about me, but ’tis always safer to cite examples from my own life and not breach lines of confidentiality.
Similarly, in other instances too, I believe that my convictions are personal. But I have grown to learn that not everyone thinks that way. Sometimes, it is important for one to be convinced and reassured of their actions by another, or in this case an ‘agent’. This ‘agent’ becomes the mediating body between the individual and the said belief. More often than not, it is through this ‘agent’, the individual finally is convinced of their decision. The most basic example I can think of is shopping. People usually shop with someone else to get an opinion of how they look in a particular piece of clothing. Some of us however, enjoy the solitary shopping, but we shall leave the tale of happy loners for another day.
But my problem lies here. If we are to continue the example of shopping, what happens when you:
a) Exhaust all ‘agents’ – I’m not sure if that is even possible but I am thinking aloud!
b) Remain unconvinced (of say, the fit or shade of the dress)
c) Perhaps the most important, are offered more than one choice (which is usually the case when ‘shopping’) and are on a tight schedule (20 minutes to the meeting and you need one silk blouse) and the agent and you arrive at different conclusions?
I do not have the answers for all these questions, but a conversation with someone very close to me a few days ago prompted such thinking.
I believe that it is important to first know what you want, before asking for opinion. There have been instances I’ve done the reverse, but the trick is to ensure that it doesn’t become a routine. You lose capacity to make decisions for yourself and the above mentioned situations become a glimpses of Hell. Moreover, it is good when you are unable to evaluate both sides of the coin. Like all things in life, this too has a flipside to it and evaluating both sides in extremity may lead to one being overly cautious *cough* however, hopefully, we would know where to draw the line in our long list of ‘pros and cons’ and perhaps do the ‘right’ thing, like Miranda in Sex and the City.