On Women Who Strive to Please

and men who, well… (I have no idea why WordPress doesn’t have a subtitle thing-a-majig)

I am a leetle hesitant to fill the well + ellipsis for reasons I refuse to publicise. While a blog does in some sense qualify as online journaling, it’s not as though I want the entire world to know, noh? Also, as quoted once in a previous post, most, if not all writing we publish online is not entirely honest. The world is too fucking judgemental for honest writing. But “then” said, my teenage cousin, “You shouldn’t care about what the world thinks?” Buttttttt, we’ve hit the twenties and realised the importance of the world, and the impact of our word(s).

So, who are these women who strive to please? While claiming to be one of them, I must also say that there is such a woman present in well, every woman. It might be one of those sweeping generalisations but as far as I know my kind, it appeals to most women and last I checked, the majority is subject to generalisation?

Us women who strive to please, no don’t get me wrong we are not limiting ourselves to sexual favours or anything to do with mere bodily contact. I speak of and for the woman who wakes up to midnight calls when he comes home drunk; opens the door for him at four am after that stag party and finds a lace g-string that was definitely not from your wardrobe in his back pocket; goes all out to cook for him and does a Samantha Jones-on-the-table-with-Sushi-on-my-body on your anniversary and eventually wear out when he doesn’t show up; wait for the call from him confirming dinner but end up sitting at the table alone with a waiter full of looks of sympathy and of the woman who falls asleep with him because he asks you to while dreaming of a white lace wedding dress, only to have him not call you back the next day after dropping you home.

Every woman I know of are subjects of such experiences and worse, experiments. While I do agree that us women are also capable of being equally conniving and opportunistic, I dunno, for some reason I feel we were made this way because of past experiences, others’ experiences and in the name of self-defence.

Every woman I know are subjects of physical and sexual violence, of any degree. We keep quiet not because we wish to but at times, it is too petty in the light of Delhi gang rapes to voice them out. But that does not make the shame, the hurt, the disappointment of the act, committed by someone you trusted, someone you looked up to or someone you genuinely liked, any better.

Every woman I know, strives to please her man. Sorry about creating a delusion of heterosexuality but for the moment let’s just say the stories that fill my ears are of the limited mainstream kind. We strive to please our men physically, sexually, with kind words, little surprises, push up bras, lace underwear and four-inch heels that burn our souls soles. I know of very few women who would meet her man in pure-home-clothes unless they are very very very comfortable with their partner. That my girl, is the rare sort of man we need to find.

Unfortunately, such men are termed rare for a reason for such men are the ones who do not disappear.

5 thoughts on “On Women Who Strive to Please

  1. Bole says:

    All men are not like this. May be you are moving with the wrong crowd. There are loads of men who are kind, polite and show respect to women, but they are not found in bars or night clubs. Try moving with the ordinary once and hope you will change your perspective towards men 🙂


    • jillinthebox90 says:

      Hi. Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂 I agree. I am very much aware of this being a sweeping generalisation. But as I said, the post was inspired by the stories I tell and those I hear. I do know nice guys whom I adore to bits.

      P.S. – I wasn’t looking for any one at a night club or bar 🙂


  2. SurovSki says:

    For every woman who has experienced something like this there is a man who has gone through the same. I have an equal amount of male and female friends and the stories are endless – we sadly live in a very selfish world where most only think of themselves and both sexes are equality guilty…


    • jillinthebox90 says:

      Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂 Yes, I heard of the same plea in India and couldn’t agree more. It’s sad that there isn’t someone to document there stories as well.



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